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If You Don’t Like My Personality, Try Another App

Updated: Sep 21, 2023

How I want to be a Notes, but really I’m a little bit Threads with a pinch of Bluesky.


Podcast Episode #19

My name is Naomi Shibles and I’m here to tell you Why I Need This Author Gig.


With each episode, I’ll share a little bit about my writing journey, sprinkled with some anecdotes so that we can share a laugh.


In this episode, I cover:

  • Kick-a** ambrosia salad

  • Social media fragmentation

  • My dream digital presence

  • Existential questions about our electric lives


 

Like many of my fellow Substackers, I have a vision of a bright future when all of my social media interaction happens on Substack Notes—where the air is clean and the chocolate river is flowing free of Augustus Gloop (such a great name, though). I picture that future like a snow-frosted mountain range with a rose-and-purple sunrise bursting from behind the peaks.


Or a perfect tea party with plenty of strawberries and champagne. Or a brisk wind streaming my hair behind me as I look to the horizon on a swift boat with pods of dolphins frolicking in the sea on either side.


But I had an epiphany this morning: there will probably never be a social media singularity. Why? Because as much as I’ve grown to resent social media, I am a multidimensional person—just like you. I’m more than a thoughtful writer and reader who enjoys alpine sunrises, tea parties, and sailing next to dolphins (Notes).


bottlenose dolphin wearing fancy sunglasses and necklaces
AI-generated image of ‘Housewives Dolphin’ from Canva.

I am also a person who relishes reality TV shows like the Real Housewives and wants to talk about them with others who proudly like them, too (Threads).


I’m someone who needs to ask my childhood friend’s mom for her ambrosia salad recipe and see pictures posted by that kid who I regret never speaking to in high school because they seem super-cool now (Facebook).


I’m a person unwilling to give up the connections that I’ve built on Twitter over many years even though I now mostly find seasonal ads, hate speech, and cat gifs there (X).


And I’m an individual willing to hang around just about anywhere people laugh at my jokes (Bluesky).


(Instagram knows what it did.)


There will probably never be a social media singularity.

While I would LOVE for my digital life to be played out elegantly and with dignity on Notes, I also love my unapologetic sociologists, sharers of lowbrow memes, cuss word enthusiasts, old lady gangs, and agents of chaos.


Will I ever be able to openly discuss Bravo TV Housewives on Substack? Maybe, someday… But for today, I have a folder of social media apps—like a ball and chain—with which to access the many facets of my personality.


Please leave a comment and tell me if you agree!


P.S. I’m absolutely not representing that these platforms are solely for my chosen topics, btw, they are whatever you want them to be—as long as other people show up and want the same things.

 

Bonnie Dedinsky’s Famous Ambrosia Salad


(2) 3.4-ounce boxes of Jell-O brand pistachio pudding

(1) 16-ounce tub of Cool Whip

(1) 16-ounce can of crushed pineapple - drained

(1) 16-ounce jar of Maraschino cherry halves - drained

(1) cup of sweetened, shredded coconut


Simply fold it all together and chill for a couple of hours before you wow your guests!

💖 Rest In Peace, Ms. Bonnie
 

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